Thanksgiving is two weeks away and I have been baking for over a month! Part of it is I am what our son calls "type A" organized, but it's more. I am truly thankful for his presence at the family table this year. That's not to say we have taken him for granted past years, rather it means I don't know where he will be next Thanksgiving. He may be deployed. We have two sons, but I am comfortable projecting that our son who is not in the military will be home with us next Thanksgiving. After all every holiday card, every television advertisement speaks to family togetherness and being "home for the holidays". We are lucky we will have that this holiday season. Like so many military families with loved ones at war, reality is creeping in and I am anticipating a new way of life... the holidays without a complete family. There are some things I just didn't expect when he joined. This is one of them.

Last year a friend of mine who has a son in Iraq told me about the free Holiday Hallmark e cards you could send troops. I sent as many as Hallmark would allow. I remember stories my father, a WW II veteran, told about his favorite aunt who kept her Christmas tree up for him until he came home. By that time it had no needles and was a fire hazard but he was able to see the ornaments and recognize her thoughtful effort. It makes me wonder how other military families with loved ones serving abroad have modified their holiday traditions. I heard about one mother who put up an American flag in her front yard the day her son left for Iraq and didn't take it down until he came home. Another wears a Marine pin so people will recognize what it symbolizes and ask her about it. I wonder what I will do when our son leaves. I keep my house and car keys on a military lanyard I wear around my neck year round. It hangs close to my heart and is in my pocketbook for safe keeping when not in use. Our family always says a heartfelt grace at every holiday dinner. It ends with "Bless those who are with us and those who are not." That is an old tradition that will carry new meaning once our son has deployed. It will be of comfort to know it is a custom he is familiar with and may well be saying to himself on his own. Somehow we each find our way to deal with the holidays. What will be yours?